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Coping
with Tragedy
Tibet's Dali Lama is a world leader in teaching about compassion. One of his most important lessons is that "true compassion is not just an emotional response, but a firm commitment founded on reason." It is easy to feel sympathy of the victims of violence -- human decency demands it. But it is much more difficult to feel true compassion for our enemies -- unshakeable understanding of how violence and rage arise in human beings, understanding that endures the bad actions of those human beings. I learned this anew in the case of Nathanial Brazil, the 13 year old boy who shot and killed his teacher in Lake Worth, Florida, May 26, 2000. Before he committed the murder, most of us would have found it easy to feel sympathy for him because of the difficult circumstances of his life. But after his deadly act many people changed their emotional response from sympathy to rage -- and many wished he be executed, or at least imprisoned for life. One friend of the murdered teacher even said in public that he hoped the boy would be raped and tortured every day while he was in prison. This response reveals that the feeling people had for this boy was sentimentality not true compassion as the Dali Lama defines it. This is an important lesson to consider as our nation responds to the terrorist assault of September 11. It is quite one thing to talk in public about "bringing the perpetrators to justice" and quite another to speak of exacting our revenge. It is one thing to understand the origins of terrorism and quite another to portray the struggle as simply one of "evil versus good." Terrorists typically are caught up in their own scenarios of revenge and retaliation. Often they have experienced personal suffering or family loss, or historical victimization, and are seeking a way to give meaning to that suffering through acts of violent revenge. Mostly, they are individuals who are offered a political or ideological interpretation for their situation by their leaders. Sometimes these leaders are pathologically calculating and cold in their exploitation of their followers. Sometimes these leaders themselves are plotting revenge for what they have experienced as victims of political oppression. For them, the terrorist acts they commit are not "unprovoked assaults," but rather are their own, sometimes warped version of "bringing the perpetrators to justice." All this is not to excuse the terrorist. No one of good faith or sensitive heart could or would do so. But if we are to do more than continue to escalate the cycle of violence we must do more than feel outrage and practice more than retaliation. We must seek a deeper understanding -- of individual terrorists and of the causes they represent. We must not fear this understanding. We must not reject those who ask for understanding. We must remember the wisdom that teaches, "if you want peace work for justice." And remember what Ghandi taught when he said, "you must be the change you wish to see in the world." The coming days and weeks will teach children and youth a great deal about justice, compassion, and revenge. They will learn lessons from what our government does on our behalf. Our goal should be to teach them at least three lessons: First, compassion and understanding are founded in strength not weakness. Let us celebrate the helpers and those who speak and act for justice and due process rather than for blood revenge. Second, protecting the stigmatized from scape-goating and "guilt by association" is an important goal of public institutions in a time of national crisis. In the wake of the first Pearl Harbor at the start of World War II we rounded up Japanese-Americans and detained them as suspected enemies of the state. We must guard against that mentality if it is indeed Arabs and Muslims who are to blame for the catastrophe of September 11. Third, understanding and compassion in the face of hate and fanaticism are virtues, not something to be afraid of. It is more than a matter of our good and their evil. Dehumanization is the enemy. Each individual has a story to tell, a human story. Even as we oppose, hunt for, and bring to justice the terrorists we should remember this. Perhaps we can even understand something about the conditions abroad that give rise to this fanatical hatred of America. Our kids are watching and listening. ------------------------------------------- |
